Tag: faith

About the Heart

My Heart Played Me…

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on My Heart Played Me…
My Heart Played Me…

One of the worst feelings in the world is betrayal.  It cuts deeper than a knife, and it strikes at the very core of who you are.  One word of betrayal can pierce your heart in ways that the imagination cannot even begin to fathom.  This knife makes deep and smooth cuts, but the end result actually leaves the heart looking more like it went through a meat grinder.  It’s unrecognizable.

I remember being in elementary school and putting together heart puzzles on Valentine’s day.  Each piece had an obvious place to fill.  Putting it back together was simple. Even when broken into pieces, the heart still held its beautiful form.  In fact once completed, the seams of the puzzle were almost invisible, and from a distance it looked as though it had never been broken before.  However, that is not the case with betrayal.  After the smooth piercing slice, you discover that your heart is no longer a heart at all.  It has morphed into a mutated bloody heap.  And the crazy part is that you can’t even remember what the original looked like.  What was it’s shape?  Did it even beat?  What was it’s rhythm?  Was it a deep beautiful shade of red?  Everything about what it used to be is wiped completely away.  All memories of the beauty of what was seem to have been ground up and tossed in the gritty mess of what used to be.

But wait…I haven’t even gotten to the worst part.  The most painful moment is not the unrecognizable mess in front of you, nor is it the distant memories of what was.  No, the most devastating part in that moment is realizing that you betrayed yourself.  You were played.

You were walking around showing off your beautiful heart…allowing others to enjoy its beauty with you.  But, the whole time there were forces unbeknownst to you at work to trick and deceive you into betraying the most beautiful gift you have…you.  And in the wake of betraying yourself, you managed to slice a few more hearts in the process.  Leaving you with a heart you can’t recognize, no trace of the beautiful memories that created your masterpiece, and hearts of the people you love bleeding along next to yours.

This happened to me.  Today, in fact.  I betrayed myself today.  And, the worst part is that the devastating betrayal went completely against my intentions.  I never intended to betray myself or anyone that I love.  I never intended to wound anyone.  And, I never intended to deceive myself.  But, I did.  Thinking I was doing the right thing, I ended up pushing someone that I deeply love away from me.   My heart betrayed me.

And while you may feel like intent matters, the truth is that it holds little weight next to the actions.  It’s easy to wish to go back in time and do everything differently, but that is not possible.  Of course, there is grace for mistakes.  But, the truth is that betrayal is painful.  It can leave you feeling hopeless.  And, it can leave you in a place of bitterness.   And, when your own heart betrays you, it can make forgiving yourself and giving yourself grace even more challenging especially when you not only hurt yourself but also those you love.  It can often feel like the end of something great, but it’s not.  It can be the beginning.

Start.  You’re now facing decision time.  The betrayal has already taken place, and now you’re at start. Just like with games, with each new level the decisions can become harder.  The only benefit is the experience/knowledge that you’ve gained from the previous levels.  So, now you decide your adventure. Many people will give up at this point. They will choose to succumb to defeat.  But, those who simply choose to play will win every time. Others will ask, “what’s the point? Why even try a new level?  It takes so much energy, and at least at this level I know I can win every time. I know all of the ins and outs. I know where I can get the hidden prizes, and I know all of the secret shortcuts.  Why keep trying? Why risk getting hurt again? And, what if I die trying?” The problem with this is that these people will never in fact win. They will never actually achieve fulfillment in life.  Their hearts will always be hit again and again in the same level with the disatisfaction of never reaching what’s just on the other side should they choose to continue to play. And, each time the bitterness will creep in a little more and the devastation will create a slightly larger hole until they’re left with a black hole.  The decision to play requires you to face more battles, but it’s one of the most fulfilling victories you will ever taste.  

So, I’ve decided to play.  I don’t know what will be at the next level.  I don’t know if I will face the same opponent just dressed up in a different costume.  I don’t know if I will know where all of the shortcuts are or where all of the extra prizes are.  I don’t know if I’ll move slowly or quickly. I don’t know if my turn will be skipped or if I will end up betraying myself again.  But, what I do know is that eventually I will win.

How can I be so confident?  It’s certainly not because I feel like I have mastered the game.  And, it’s definitely not because I know all of the weaknesses of my opponent, but what I do know is that I can no longer bet my victory on my heart.  My heart will always try to lead itself, and if I’m not careful, it will try to play me again. Instead, I need to anchor my heart on something that will keep it steady.  My heart has the power to bring life to every part of who I am, but it also has the power to hurt me. So, I’m learning. I’m learning to choose hope even when the door has been slammed in my face over and over.  My hope is no longer based on my heart. It’s based on something greater…the growing foundation of my heart…Truth. And, I’m learning to trust even when I’ve been deceived because I’m learning that my trust cannot only rely on my heart…it’s meant to lean on something stronger.  I’m learning to take risks and leap into faith even when I’ve fallen on my face a hundred times because my faith has always been meant to grow. 

One day, I’ll win. One day, I’ll be invited to the next level. One day, I’ll be at start all over again. One day, I’ll go through the same ups and downs as the level before…only with greater intensity.  But….one day, I’ll be a little stronger and a little wiser. And, one day my heart will be a little more anchored. And, one day I’ll smile a little longer. And, one day I’ll trust that the people I’ve wounded along the way will encounter Love in deeper ways than I could ever give love.  And, one day I’ll look back and see the beautiful masterpiece I’ve created. A new heart full of life and wisdom…a heart that beats a melody of love…a heart that is full of laughter…a heart that heals…a heart that brings joy…a heart that found victory…a heart that tells a story of hope.  My heart will find rest.

Jeremiah 17: 9-10;14

“‘The heart is hopelessly dark and deceitful, a puzzle that no one can figure out.  But I, God, search the heart and examine the mind. I get to the heart of the human.  I get to the root of things.  I treat them as they really are, not as they pretend to be.’ […] God, pick up the pieces.  Put me back together again. You are my praise!”

Starting,

The Lily

About Friendship

A Letter to My Friend

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on A Letter to My Friend
A Letter to My Friend

Dear Friend,

Thank you…from the bottom of my heart.  The other day we went swimming, and you started giggling because the baby boy inside of you started dancing when you walked into the pool.  I smiled because I love knowing that there is a life growing inside of you.  I smiled because I appreciate how great of a mom you will be to your baby.  And, I smiled because I can’t wait to one day feel that too.  But, then you did something I didn’t expect.  You grabbed my hand and placed it on your belly, and I got to feel your baby boy move his tiny foot or elbow.  And, I was overwhelmed.

I can’t thank you enough for sharing that with me.  The last 6.5 years of trying to conceive and losing three babies has been one of the most up and down roller coasters I have ever experienced.  There was a season of several years where I wanted to hold onto my pain and hide.  I would hide from baby showers, pregnancy announcements, new-born visits, and more.  I allowed pain to go so deep that I could barely hold it together when I was asked by friends when we were planning on trying to have children.

I used to look at babies from a distance…longing to hold them…but not wanting to appear desperate and not wanting to break down.  I didn’t know what to do with the thoughts of jealousy that plagued my heart and mind.  I didn’t know what to do with the disappointment and the fear of disappointment.  I didn’t know what to do with the void that I felt was growing deeper in my heart.  I didn’t  know how tightly I could hold onto hope or for how long.  I didn’t know what to do with the lies that plagued my brain regarding the very essence of my womanhood.  I didn’t know what to do with feeling like I was the most unloved, forgotten, lonely, and unwanted woman on the planet.  I didn’t know how to celebrate others.  I didn’t know how to fix anything.

I remember trying to justify the entire situation by thinking that I could choose gratitude and help other women who were in the same boat.  Maybe if I was good enough, kind enough and loved well enough then just maybe I would be remembered.  Perhaps if I shared enough hope with enough people, then God would look down from Heaven, smile, and bless me with the gift of a child.  But, that’s not how it works.

Hope is not gifted or granted to those who perform well.  Hope is not bestowed upon those who gravel and destroy their value by trying to get everything perfect.  Hope is not a prize to be won.  Hope is not earned or deserved.  Hope is not given to people who only have “the right hearts” or the sincerest of motives.  Hope just comes when it’s time.  It is always waiting nearby.  It stands on the edge waiting to see if you will notice it.  While you are spending your time bathing in the filth of self-pity, anger, and bitterness…hope is ready and waiting to clean you off and clothe you in beauty.  Hope is waiting to grace your lips with a smile, to fill your eyes with light, and to overwhelm your very spirit with joy.  It is waiting to celebrate YOU.

How do you walk in this hope?  You let it take you by surprise.  You can’t plan it.  There is no formula.  You might catch the wave and fall off again, but that’s okay.  It’s not going to leave you.  There will always be a spot for you inside of Hope.  There is a party hat with your name on it, a thousand candles for your dreams to ride upon, and a never-ending celebration waiting for you.  And, the best part of all is that Hope is contagious.  It’s even more infectious than a yawn.  It will spread like wildfire, and you will be released to celebrate with all of the others who choose to receive it.

So, thank you my beautiful friend for surprising me once again with Hope and for allowing me to dream again.  And, thank you sweet baby boy growing inside of my beautiful friend.  You are a carrier of the power of Hope.  I can’t wait to watch you grow into a man of greatness who will set people free and restore in them the audacity to hope and the freedom to dream again because the truth is that you’ve inspired me to sing again.  And one day soon, I’ll kiss those dreams I’ve dreamed, I’ll cradle Hope in my arms, and this part of my song will be complete.

Receiving Gifts I Haven’t Earned,

The Lily

About Life

The Friend I Never Knew

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on The Friend I Never Knew

It’s me.  What?  Yeah, it’s true.  After 31 years, I am beginning a new friendship, and it’s with myself.  I know that it may sound weird or crazy, but I just realized that for the majority of my life I have been my own “mean girl.”  Obviously, I didn’t do this intentionally.  I don’t think anyone in their right mind would become their own worst enemy, but somehow that is exactly what I did.

Everyone speaks to themselves whether it is out loud or in their heads.  We all do it.  We are quick to share our opinions, judgments, and offenses.  As soon as we screw up a project at work, we listen to the first thoughts in our head that tell us we are a failure, and then we beat ourselves up over and over again.  And, we don’t stop there.  We continue to listen to the lies, and we remind ourselves about all of the other situations in our lives where we have been in a similar circumstance and have made the same mistakes.  We call ourselves stupid and condemn our potential.  We align with the first accusatory notions that creep into the back of our brains.  We stand in front of the mirror, and we pinpoint every single potential flaw, fixate on it, and project ugliness over our entire body.  We refuse to let ourselves receive a compliment.  We choose to believe that compliments and kind words are actually being laced in sarcasm.  Or, we negate the kindness/compliment because if he/she knew who we really were then he/she would NEVER in a million years dream of showing that same kindness.  We choose to listen to fear, and align ourselves with the lies that we will never be good enough.  We stay in a place of judgement against ourselves as we compare ourselves to both the people we deem better than ourselves and less than.  Our worth comes through our own perverted judgments, and it has FINALLY started to make me sick.

I don’t get it.  We have been so conditioned by society, our environment, and our own personal experiences that we have bought into the lie that we have to be our own worst enemy.  We believe that we will ALWAYS disappoint ourselves.  We will ALWAYS be watched by others because if we are watching ourselves this intently…then EVERYONE must be watching us with the same (if not more) intensity.  We HAVE to be on trial every minute of the day.  Otherwise, we will be deemed a permanent ugly, miserable, outcast who doesn’t know how to dress, has no personality, will never amount to anything, is a terrible example of a human being, and is basically a disgrace to all mankind.  We are not worthy of friends, love, children, family, spouses, or any other significant relationship.  Nor, will we ever be able to have any sort of future.  Dreams are for the birds.  We go home at night, sit in front of the tv for hours, and let the doctrines of others filtrate our minds filling us with even more ammo for tomorrow because there are certain to be a thousand more times the next day in which to view ourselves unfit and unworthy to be loved.

This way of living is DISGUSTING and PERVERSE!  It is THE MOST TWISTED perception that we could ever choose to adopt.  IT MUST STOP!

Over the past few years, I have slowly began shifting my previous paradigm.  Don’t get me wrong, it has taken some time and effort, but it’s shifting.  I’ve had to let go of my control, and I’ve had to allow TRUTH to teach me who I really am.  And, as I’ve started to catch glimpses of my incredible and stunning beauty, I’ve started to become my own friend.  Where I used to adopt and align with the first lies that would pop in my head about myself, I now find myself looking to TRUTH and choosing what He says about me.  I’ve started to encourage myself to pursue my dreams and fight for the things I love.  My heart has begun to heal from the many daggers I’ve thrust into its core.  I look in the mirror, and my mind is flooded with praise and warm accolades of my body.  My eyes have started to sparkle, and my smile doesn’t fade quite as much as it used to.  Through TRUTH, I have unlocked my creativity in ways I never thought were possible.  I pick myself up when I fail, and I remind myself how smart and intelligent I am.  I encourage my spirit to fall deeper in love with TRUTH.  I am becoming quick to forgive myself and to allow grace to flood my heart and mind.  I catch glimpses of the greatness of me, and it causes my face to glow.  I’m not afraid to cast the reflection of TRUTH in a thousand directions because I know that I am the most beautiful carrier of Him that I could ever hope to be.  I’m beginning to look like Him, and as a result…I’ve gained a new friend.

Shifting Paradigms,

– The Lily

Proverbs 17:17a

“A friend loves at all times.”

 

About Life

The Gift of Pain

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on The Gift of Pain
The Gift of Pain

I never realized that with pain came a gift.  To me, it always seemed to just keep me in an utter state of misery.  It came in all sorts of shapes and sizes, but none of them had a pretty red bow on top.  I’ve seen it come wrapped as a package with the tag labeled grief, disappointment, rejection, shattered dreams, missed opportunities, depression, fear, anxiety, and more.  And, believe me those packages have never been received with welcoming arms.  Instead, they’ve produced thousands upon thousands of tears, hurt, and gut wrenching wails from places deeper inside me than I knew I had. And, then there’s the pain that is deeper than your emotions where it touches your spirit and there are no words to describe those depths.  Never once when first handed these packages did I see them as a gift until now.

My mentor has always said, “Everyone has a mess, but it is up to you whether you will allow it to lead you to misery or to your miracle story.”  And, I’ve realized that this is true.  From a place of pain we have an opportunity to either stay in our misery, or we have the opportunity for a miracle story.  Pain gives us the gift of allowing us to see who God really is, should we choose to look.  It requires a new perspective and new lenses in which we can come face to face with God, and peer into the eyes of Love.

I always knew that Jesus died for our sins, but I had no idea that He actually died for our pain as well.  He doesn’t want us to carry it.  You see, I never knew how GOOD God really is.  I didn’t understand how He could really be truly good when I’ve experience so much pain and everywhere I look, I see others in pain too.  I didn’t understand that when Jesus died it was also because He didn’t want me to have to live in my pain and misery.  He stepped in and asked to take it from me.  His love is so great that He is willing to not just take my pain but also carry it for me so that I don’t have to ever pick it up again.  He wants to protect me, and He desires to give me GOOD gifts in exchange.

And at the same time, in the midst of handing over the pain and then seeing it through His eyes, He allows me the privilege of seeing what He sees and feeling what He feels.  He allows me to feel how much He loves others because He doesn’t value one person more than the next.  He allows me the honor of feeling how His heart grieves when the people He loves reject Him.  And, it isn’t a grief that comes from disappointment spurred by rejection; it’s a grief that comes because the people He loves are choosing to not receive the BEST GIFT that has ever existed – LOVE.  He isn’t grieving out of His own personal offense when we make mistakes and bring pain into our lives.  He is grieving instead because He sees how much pain we are bringing into our lives, and He DOESN’T want us to feel that way – EVER.  It was never His intent.  But, as a result of experiencing pain, giving it to Jesus, and then seeing what He sees, I have chosen to receive this gift of love which brings healing to my spirit and has allowed me to begin to love those around me with a hint of the love that He has for them.

The most beautiful and powerful portrayal of this kind of love that I have experienced through pain is in the movie The Shack.  The only words I have to describe it is that it is the most powerful movie I have ever seen in my entire life, and it has the ability to bring healing to the very spirit of man.  It portrays Love in the truest form, and it demonstrates the gift of pain in the most beautiful way I have ever seen.  If you haven’t seen it, you should watch it.  I know it will bring restoration to the deepest parts of who you are should you choose to let it.

Opening Good Gifts,

-The Lily

John 16:33

I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace. In the world you have tribulation and distress and suffering, but be courageous [be confident, be undaunted, be filled with joy]; I have overcome the world.” [My conquest is accomplished, My victory abiding.]

 

About Marriage

Finding the Right Pieces

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on Finding the Right Pieces
Finding the Right Pieces

You can’t always control the thoughts that come through your head, and I used to think that many of the thoughts that came through my head meant that I was defined by them; however, what I have come to realize is that it isn’t true.   Yesterday, was a day of putting back together puzzle pieces that I had knocked to the floor two days ago.  However, yesterday as I was putting back the pieces, I managed to grab a few pieces that looked like they fit, but in reality didn’t fit at all…

Even though I made a conscious choice yesterday to choose to put the pieces of the puzzle back together, fear still tried to slip in and get me off track.  Even this morning, it reared its ugly head attempting to get me to hold onto offenses in order to self-protect, to swallow the poison it wanted to attach to genuine acts of love from those I love, and to get lost in its destructive nature.  It almost felt like fear was sitting right next to me handing me puzzle pieces that looked exactly like the real ones, but when I tried to make them fit it didn’t work.  Not to mention, when I stepped back from the puzzle, they looked counterfeit.

The good news is that fear did not win.  And just because I had those involuntary thoughts (that had I chosen to believe them would have not only negatively impacted me but also those I love), doesn’t mean that I am still a slave to fear!  It’s just not who I am.  I am someone who believes the best in all circumstances, even when it’s hard.

This morning when I woke up and fear started attempting to get me to align with its lies, I went into our room and shared my thoughts with my husband.  And, I was blown away by the grace he gave me as I voiced some of the lies that were trying to creep into my brain.  One of fear’s goals is to not only rob you of everything you are and the relationships you have, but it also wants to ISOLATE you to where you feel completely alone and like you can trust no one.  It puts you in a place where you begin to question the motives of everyone you meet because it tells you that in order to be safe, you have to protect yourself.  And, that is just not true.

As soon as I had voiced the fears that were trying to influence me, instead of being offended or trying to self-protect like most of us tend to do (especially with the ones closest to us), my husband laid down his opportunity to pick up offense and cared with and for me.  He spoke truth and peace over me, and as he prayed for me all of those fears vanished.  It was like a heavy fog of confusion lifted, and I could see clearly again.  My husband’s love for me is the most beautiful gift I have ever received.  He has taught me what it looks like to be loved unconditionally.  He has shown me what it means to truly love and fight for the ones you love.  He never gives up even when it is hard.  He has given me grace over and over again.  He doesn’t hold things against me or shut me out because he walks in the confidence of who he was created to be.  He willing lays down his own shields of self-protection and instead takes up his shield of faith because he knows Truth intimately, and he is not afraid.  He is teaching me how to love and give grace abundantly, and it is the most beautiful gift I have ever received.

Today, as I finish out my day I have hope because the involuntary thoughts that come to me are seeds waiting to be planted.  They are not part of who I am, but I get to choose what I am going to do with them.  I have the power to plant and water them or to reject them, but regardless they do not define who I am.  And should fear attempt to knock on my door again today, I will thank God for what He has saved me from, and I will plant a seed of faith in its place because I am becoming the woman I was made to be.  And, I will not stop on this journey.  I will not give up because if I don’t quit…I win.

Planting Seeds and Making Things Right,

– The Lily

Romans 12:2

“And do not be conformed to this world [any longer with its superficial values and customs], but be transformed and progressively changed [as you mature spiritually] by the renewing of your mind [focusing on godly values and ethical attitudes], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His plan and purpose for you].”

About Marriage

Putting the Puzzle Together Again

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on Putting the Puzzle Together Again
Putting the Puzzle Together Again

Every Christmas my husband and I buy a puzzle to put together.  This tradition has allowed us to unintentionally slow down while affording us the opportunity to connect.  I normally put the puzzle out at the beginning of December, and it takes a few weeks for us to put it together.  We spend the time finding the right pieces while talking about our dreams, reflecting on the past, and enjoying the present.  As we connect, we continually find ourselves looking back at the picture on the box to make sure that we are on the right track.  These are some of my all-time favorite moments because for a few hours each day it feels as if I’m transported into a simpler time where dreams are made while neighbors are caroling and hearts are intertwined over steamy mugs of cocoa.  It’s funny because these are some of the moments I cherish the most because of how closely connected I feel to my husband during those hours.

Once our puzzle is finished, we will leave it on display for a week or so, but then comes the day when we take it down.  The funny thing is that we both put so much work into it, but normally it is only one of us who puts it away.  Instead of hours it took to build, it only takes about 30 seconds to break it apart and put it back in the box.  And, unfortunately sometimes the puzzle box tips over and a piece or two gets lost into the abyss never to be found again.

Yesterday, felt like one of those puzzle demolition days.  As I was reflecting today on all that occurred yesterday, I realized how easy it is to destroy beautiful things, and at the same time how much time, energy, and commitment it takes to build something beautiful.  This is especially true with the relationships in our lives.  It’s true that we either operate out of fear or love – that’s it.  Every thought that enters our brains, every word we say, every action we take, they are all motivated out of one or the other.  And, both take time to cultivate and mature; however, I believe that it is easier to choose fear more consistently.  The harder choice for me tends to be love, especially in the relationships I have with the people I care about the most.  You see, the truth is that I don’t want to get hurt, and therefore…I attempt to pick back up those old dingy worthless shields I’ve made for myself.  You know, the ones that don’t work and actually make things worse?  Yeah, for some reason my brain sometimes gets tricked into not completely separating myself from them.

Yesterday, I chose to see the world through fear in an attempt to protect myself, and as a result I hurt not only myself, but also people that I love.  The worse part about it is that NOTHING about fear is LOGICAL.  It operates out of lies and influences our imaginations to think of the MOST ABSURD things.  And, if we allow it to creep in or give it a voice, it does much more than simply change our lens of perception.  Additionally, fear hurls situations, memories, conspiracies, and more lies at us because it knows that we are no longer looking through the lens of love and truth.  And, that’s where it begins destroying not only us but also the people we love and trust.  It’s like a tornado – it is always changing course and we never know quite how destructive it will be, but what I can tell you is that it will ALWAYS bring pain.

Fear will take years of positive and intimate relationships with family and friends and attempt to destroy them all within a month or two.  And, then as you begin to rebuild those relationships, it will lace kind words and true love with poison to where every time you go to receive love it is twisted and ends up wreaking of death and ill will.  It will attempt to steal any type of trust you have ever had.  And, it is on a warpath to rip your identity out from under you to where you can never actually believe that you are valuable, lovable, protected, or wanted.  It is sheer evil, and it needs to be stopped.

You see, we were never meant to live in fear.  We were made to come alive and to live and operate out of love.  And, there is ALWAYS HOPE in love.  Yesterday, doesn’t define me.  Even though I gave into fear yesterday, I WILL NOT give into fear today.  I’ve lived too many years under the slavery of fear, and its desire is to control me again.  But, it will not have that satisfaction.  Fear no longer has power in my life.  It doesn’t get to decide if it will rule my heart and mind.  It doesn’t get to determine how I interact with the ones I love.  It doesn’t get to speak lies that sound like truth to get me to believe them.  And, while I may have knocked a few pieces of the beautiful picture I was creating to the ground yesterday, I found them today, and I’m putting them back together.  The best part about knocking down the puzzle is that you see where you scattered the pieces, and you can remember what it is supposed to look like and how to get the pieces to fit back into the puzzle again.

It’s about direction not perfection.  And, my choice is to continue to live and grow in love and to bring that into the relationships around me.  I will live a full life filled to the brim with hope and joy because that is what I was created to do.  The people I love in my life will know beyond a shadow of a doubt how greatly and deeply they are loved, wanted, valued, cherished, appreciated, and respected because when they look in my eyes, they will see their true identity.  My choices will bring freedom and hope to people.  I am not, nor will I ever be again, a woman of destruction who operates out of fear.  From today forward, I will only build.  And the pieces that I have scattered, I will put back together today, and I will continue to make a life that reflects the beauty of Love no matter how easy or difficult it may be.

Putting the Pieces Together Again,

– The Lily

2 Corinthians 5:17 

“Therefore if anyone is in Christ [that is, grafted in, joined to Him by faith in Him as Savior], he is a new creature [reborn and renewed by the Holy Spirit]; the old things [the previous moral and spiritual condition] have passed away. Behold, new things have come [because spiritual awakening brings a new life].”

About Life

Loving Your Enemies

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on Loving Your Enemies
Loving Your Enemies

In our current world we are faced with enemies everyday.  Even if they aren’t our own, we see the pictures of their victims on social media, and we see the pain of persecution on their faces.  We face enemies in our own lives whether big or small, and we are left with a choices.  The first choices we face are whether or not to forgive which is a lesson in and of itself, but once we choose to forgive we are faced with what can be an even more difficult choice – the choice to love.

Loving our enemies doesn’t make any logical sense.  I think many people confuse love with the acceptance of evil, and it leaves a bitter taste in the mouths of the victims.  But, what I am learning is that loving your enemies actually brings you freedom.  However, it is impossible to love your enemy if you don’t know who you are and how valuable you are.  If you come at it from a place of insecurity, then you will find yourself constantly trying to protect yourself.  You will see the need to point the finger at your enemy and hurl what may be “just” accusations toward him/her, but the truth is it will leave in you a never-ending cycle of pain.  And, all I can tell you is that you were meant to live a life of hope and love.

The truth is that no one would bring pain and harm into your life if they really knew who they were – LOVED.  People can only give out of the seeds that have been planted inside of them and that they have chosen to water.  If they have been watering lies, then those lies now have roots and unfortunately those lies are only out to steal, kill and destroy TRUTH.  Therefore, they will attempt to take down anyone and anything that stands in their way, thus resulting in spewing words of hate, stealing joy, betraying friends, rejoicing in selfish gain, living in pride, and the list goes on and on.  People who have forgotten and/or have never known their true value will spend their lives trying to steal the value they see in others for themselves which only brings pain to both parties should the victim allow it to happen.  (Please, understand that I know there are some situations where abuse is taking place, and I am not condoning or supporting any sort of abusive situation.)

This ugly cycle can stop.  It stops the moment we choose to forgive.  But, the best part is that the cycle is re-written the moment we choose to love.  It’s the moment we pray the same prayers we pray for ourselves over our enemies.  It’s the moment our hearts break for the people who are bringing us harm because we can see the pain they live in, and our hearts hurt for their lack of understanding of their true identity.  It’s the moment when fear leaves and Perfect Love walks in the room.  It’s the moment when jealousy is not an option and comparison fades.  It’s the moment when Truth takes the throne and self-protection dies.  It’s the moment of miracles.  It’s the invitation to change not only your world, but the world of everyone that person will encounter because you care just as much about their healing as your own.  And, the best part is that when you reach that place you find true freedom and hope.  You can live without fear and worry.  You can trust completely because you were created to trust the Living God, and He is the one who will sing songs of love over your life and protect your heart.  He will look on you for all of eternity with eyes of love, and He will remember every promise that He has ever spoken to you.  And, He will teach you about true LOVE to where you are so full that NOTHING can take away the knowledge of His goodness.  And, no one can steal your identity because it was never meant to be given to you by man but by the One who has the Eyes of Love.

Today, I challenge you to step into love.  Move beyond forgiveness and into love.  It will look differently for everyone.  It doesn’t mean that you necessarily will ever see your enemy again (or that you should), but it does mean that you can position your heart to pray for the pain inside of your enemy.  It does mean that you can pray for healing and love to reach that person.  Because if you have ever encountered true LOVE, you know how powerful it is.  It is a force that cannot be reckoned with, and it has the power to change even the ugliest of hearts and make it beautiful.  Love is in the business of bringing dead things to life.

Who knows the weight of the power you hold because you more than anyone on this earth have experienced some of the pain that your enemy has walked through because they shared it with you, so you have been given a gift to take that pain and pray for wholeness and healing in a way that only you can.  Who knows what miracles will happen as a result?  Who knows how many lives you will save from experiencing similar pain because you have chosen to love your enemy?  Who knows how much hope and life will come as a result of your love?  I guarantee that it will change the course of history.  And, you will be part of a miracle story that sets you free and full of  joy while unleashing a flood of transforming love on your enemy.  I know that it might be painful, but you don’t have to keep that pain.  You can give it to the One with the Eyes of Love, and I guarantee you that He will carry it for you.  And if it tries to come back, just give it back to Him again.  It can’t stay because it was never meant to be yours in the first place.  You were meant for freedom.  It’s time to come alive and step into love.  It’s time to break free.

Becoming a Lover,

– The Lily

Luke 6: 35-38

“But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. ‘Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.'”

 

About Life

Real Hope

by iamthelily3 Comments on Real Hope
Real Hope

Real hope comes as a result of truth spoken in love and shielded by faith.  It rides on the wings of anticipation, and it shifts atmospheres.  It can be seen in the eyes of a child or in the smiles of the old.  It is more delicate than a flower, but stronger than an army.  It is water to the soul and a lamp to the misguided.  It brings life wherever it goes. It’s the fuel of miracles and the foundation of dreams.  And, it is real.

The beauty of hope is that it cannot disappoint when it rides on the wings of anticipation.  Anticipation allows us to await eagerly what is to come.  It keeps offense from entering our hearts and minds as it sees every circumstance as an opportunity for a miracle.  It keeps our hearts humble and teachable all the while allowing us to enter into the thrill of the unknown.  It creates a pathway for creativity to spring forth and awaken our passions. Hope then takes those passions and sets them on fire.

Real hope has eyes to see past old ways of thinking and the ability to lock in with the truth.  It can see the gold in any situation no matter what appears to be on the outside, and it doesn’t get confused when the gold is being refined.  You see, the gold is sometimes buried so deeply inside of our circumstances that before it can come to the surface and grow, it needs to be cleaned.  Unfortunately, sometimes when the cleansing waters come, the dirt surrounding the gold turns to mud, and the gold looks even worse than it did before.  But, true hope knows and believes that the bleakness of the mud is a result of something beautiful that is being formed.  Real hope doesn’t get distracted by the ugliness of the outer appearance.  It doesn’t get overwhelmed or fearful that the gold will be stuck in mud forever.  It doesn’t give up and drop the gold back in the dirt.  Real hope has the ability to see that the gold is still there, and that these circumstances are only purifying the gold to bring about its true value regardless of its appearance.

Hope brings about the miraculous.  It is a forerunner for the impossible, and it heals the soul.  Give yourself permission to live in anticipation and rely on hope.  Allow yourself to awaken to new passions, to heal, and to come alive.  And if you get caught in some mud through the process, take the time to find the gold.  You won’t be disappointed.

Looking for Gold,

– The Lily

Proverbs 10:28

“The hope of the righteous brings joy, but the expectation of the wicked will perish.”

About Life

Lies + Truth = Lies

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on Lies + Truth = Lies

I think that some of the most hurtful lies are not the ones that are blatant and outright, but they are the ones that are sprinkled with truth.  They are the zingers laced in sarcasm, the truth framed in fear, and/or the hope tied to negative expectations.  The most devastating part of these lies is that there is a nugget of truth to them; however, the way in which the truth is communicated sets people up for more pain and confusion than most blatant lies.  These types of lies are masked with a sense of care that appeal to the need of the human heart to be loved, but even though there are bits of truth they are drowned out in the package that they come in – a lie.

These lies not only influence the recipient, but they set the giver up for failure as well.  They produce a sense of genuine care and concern for the other person.  The lies take on the assumption that because there is a bit of truth, then the package in which they are coming in is wrapped in true love and concern for the recipient’s well-being.  Thus, both parties are left reeling in confusion all the while believing that every word and feeling behind the words are evidence of real truth and care.  But, that is not the case.

Real truth can only be given in love.  And, love always hopes, it never gives up, it always believes the best, it is never self-seeking, it doesn’t boast, and it is always given without strings attached.  To discern whether or not your truth is laced in lies, take a step back and evaluate the feelings behind what you are communicating.  Are you picking up old shields of self-protection?  Are you speaking truth to get something in return?  Are you believing the best?

Speaking the truth and loving well requires us to lay down those shields of self-protection.  It asks us to give our trust to Hope and allow Faith and Love to protect us and meet the needs within our hearts.  It requires strength beyond what is humanly possible.  And, it can only truly be done when you find your true Hope and Love from the One who created them.  It’s time to stop lying, to love fiercely, and to hope fervently.  It’s time to trust.

Taking A Risk,

– The Lily

Isaiah 26:3
“You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.”

 

 

About Identity

Finding Significance

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on Finding Significance
Finding Significance

Life seems to be an endless scavenger hunt in the search for significance.  We look for clues everyday to tell us where our true significance lies.  We look for it in the expressions of the ones we love, in the numbers at the end of the day, in the smiles of content customers, in the giggles of children, in the praise of a boss, in the dreams of our future, and in the man in the mirror.  And yet, all of those glimpses of significance are only clues that will either lead us to true significance or send us on a never-ending wild goose chase.

I’ve done both, and I can tell you that the goose chase only leaves you empty inside.  The goose chase can bring you the highs that come with accolades from a great performance or with the approving gaze of a stranger.  These highs feel exhilarating, but the problem is that they are short-lived and addicting.  They actually condition us to seek out more attention and praise in order to get the next hit of euphoria, but what we don’t realize is that in our search for significance we actually give up our identity.  We become only as good as the next high-five or pat on the back.  The things we once loved seem to dim as they aren’t quite as appealing as they once were.  We need bigger and better words of praise, and our performance now feeds our significance thus causing us to miss out on the joy of who we are meant to be.  It is a vicious cycle with the allusion of importance, but in reality we are stripping ourselves of our very identity.

So, how do you avoid the endless goose chase?  Well, what I can tell you is that your true significance can only come from the God who created you.  He is the only one who can actually speak truth to you in a way that will cause your soul and spirit to awaken to who you really are created to be.  And, the only way to hear Him speak to you is to ask Him too.  It’s really that simple.  It most likely won’t be an audible voice, but the more you ask, the more you will start to see the truth of who you are meant to be – a man/woman of significance marked by LOVE.  And, the best part about this revelation is that it doesn’t have highs and lows.  It only has highs that get higher. PERIOD.  It doesn’t leave you in a funk always searching for the next bigger and better thing to tell you that you are worth something.  It has a finality to it that is eternal, and quite frankly it is the biggest and best thing that there is in this life.

Although this may be new, I challenge you to take a few minutes each day this week, and ask God to show you your significance.  It doesn’t have to be anything fancy.  You don’t even have to close your eyes.  Just ask Him, and listen to what He has to say.  I promise you won’t be disappointed.

Asking and Listening,

– The Lily

Jeremiah 33:3

“Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.”