Tag: love

About Life

Lies + Truth = Lies

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on Lies + Truth = Lies

I think that some of the most hurtful lies are not the ones that are blatant and outright, but they are the ones that are sprinkled with truth.  They are the zingers laced in sarcasm, the truth framed in fear, and/or the hope tied to negative expectations.  The most devastating part of these lies is that there is a nugget of truth to them; however, the way in which the truth is communicated sets people up for more pain and confusion than most blatant lies.  These types of lies are masked with a sense of care that appeal to the need of the human heart to be loved, but even though there are bits of truth they are drowned out in the package that they come in – a lie.

These lies not only influence the recipient, but they set the giver up for failure as well.  They produce a sense of genuine care and concern for the other person.  The lies take on the assumption that because there is a bit of truth, then the package in which they are coming in is wrapped in true love and concern for the recipient’s well-being.  Thus, both parties are left reeling in confusion all the while believing that every word and feeling behind the words are evidence of real truth and care.  But, that is not the case.

Real truth can only be given in love.  And, love always hopes, it never gives up, it always believes the best, it is never self-seeking, it doesn’t boast, and it is always given without strings attached.  To discern whether or not your truth is laced in lies, take a step back and evaluate the feelings behind what you are communicating.  Are you picking up old shields of self-protection?  Are you speaking truth to get something in return?  Are you believing the best?

Speaking the truth and loving well requires us to lay down those shields of self-protection.  It asks us to give our trust to Hope and allow Faith and Love to protect us and meet the needs within our hearts.  It requires strength beyond what is humanly possible.  And, it can only truly be done when you find your true Hope and Love from the One who created them.  It’s time to stop lying, to love fiercely, and to hope fervently.  It’s time to trust.

Taking A Risk,

– The Lily

Isaiah 26:3
“You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.”

 

 

About Identity

Finding Significance

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on Finding Significance
Finding Significance

Life seems to be an endless scavenger hunt in the search for significance.  We look for clues everyday to tell us where our true significance lies.  We look for it in the expressions of the ones we love, in the numbers at the end of the day, in the smiles of content customers, in the giggles of children, in the praise of a boss, in the dreams of our future, and in the man in the mirror.  And yet, all of those glimpses of significance are only clues that will either lead us to true significance or send us on a never-ending wild goose chase.

I’ve done both, and I can tell you that the goose chase only leaves you empty inside.  The goose chase can bring you the highs that come with accolades from a great performance or with the approving gaze of a stranger.  These highs feel exhilarating, but the problem is that they are short-lived and addicting.  They actually condition us to seek out more attention and praise in order to get the next hit of euphoria, but what we don’t realize is that in our search for significance we actually give up our identity.  We become only as good as the next high-five or pat on the back.  The things we once loved seem to dim as they aren’t quite as appealing as they once were.  We need bigger and better words of praise, and our performance now feeds our significance thus causing us to miss out on the joy of who we are meant to be.  It is a vicious cycle with the allusion of importance, but in reality we are stripping ourselves of our very identity.

So, how do you avoid the endless goose chase?  Well, what I can tell you is that your true significance can only come from the God who created you.  He is the only one who can actually speak truth to you in a way that will cause your soul and spirit to awaken to who you really are created to be.  And, the only way to hear Him speak to you is to ask Him too.  It’s really that simple.  It most likely won’t be an audible voice, but the more you ask, the more you will start to see the truth of who you are meant to be – a man/woman of significance marked by LOVE.  And, the best part about this revelation is that it doesn’t have highs and lows.  It only has highs that get higher. PERIOD.  It doesn’t leave you in a funk always searching for the next bigger and better thing to tell you that you are worth something.  It has a finality to it that is eternal, and quite frankly it is the biggest and best thing that there is in this life.

Although this may be new, I challenge you to take a few minutes each day this week, and ask God to show you your significance.  It doesn’t have to be anything fancy.  You don’t even have to close your eyes.  Just ask Him, and listen to what He has to say.  I promise you won’t be disappointed.

Asking and Listening,

– The Lily

Jeremiah 33:3

“Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.”

 

Uncategorized

Trading My Crown of Pity

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on Trading My Crown of Pity

I’ve lived most of my life subconsciously thinking that the greatest act of glory I could bring myself was by proudly adorning my head with a crown of pity bejeweled with stones of false humility.  I walked around with my face downcast displaying the hardships of my life in a way that would hopefully cause others to notice the strength of my identity as I had faced more trials and pain than many would in a lifetime.  My tears and downtrodden countenance were a permanent tattoo for the world to see that my life had been marked in pain, and yet I was strong.  I believed there was a depth to me that was unparalleled because of the internal pain I suffered.  And the more pain I felt, the bigger my crown became and the larger my jewels.  I would never shout from a megaphone that I wanted the sympathy and empathy of others, but that is how I lived my life without saying a word.  And, what did I realize?

It is 100% a load of crap.  WHAT?!?!?!

Yes, it’s true.  The best way I can describe it is that I was living in a pile of dung thinking I was at a day spa.  I would rub the feces all over myself imagining that the warmth was comforting.  The wind would blow causing the stench to be drowned out by the smell of flowers down the field, and I would get lost in my pile of dung.  Those scents of floral ecstasy were the feelings of sentiment expressed by the ones I loved who would reach down grab a handful of dung and rub my back with it.  And, then there were the times where the wind would stop, and I would get a glimpse of reality.  Those were the times when the pain would become overwhelming and try to swallow me whole.  The highs and lows of my emotions were extreme, and they were controlling my life until recently.

I don’t have a magic formula for how to get out of a dung spa.  And, I wasn’t the one who got myself out of it.  There was a moment recently where while I was sitting in my pile of dung, I could see there were at least 5 more truck loads of feces backing up to add to my pile.  And, there was also a crown of pity at least 100x larger than the one I was wearing that was waiting for me if I chose to take it.  But for the first time in my life I had a moment of divine clarity in which I could see my mess for what it was, and I looked up and I saw the most beautiful sight I’ve ever seen.  I saw the Eyes of Love, and as I got lost in His eyes, His hand reached down, grabbed my hand, and pulled me out of my mess.

When I stood before Him, the stench of my self-pity vanished.  He took my crown and tossed it to the side.  It had lost all of its previous glory and beauty.  In His presence, it looked dingy, tarnished, and cheap.  And, then I watched as He pulled from behind His back the most beautiful and simple crown I have ever seen.  It was the most delicate floral masterpiece covered in diamonds and reflecting the light of His eyes in a thousand directions.  He placed it on my head, and I began to spin.  As I twirled, I watched the light catch and send dancing sparkles in a thousand directions.  He put a smile on my face and love in my eyes where there had been pain and disappointment.  He gave me true beauty, and I will never be the same.

You won’t find me back in my old favorite spots because I’ve seen the truth.   You will never see me searching for that old crown because my life is now radiant, and I wear a crown of joy.  It’s not bejeweled with false humility but with hope.  And, I’ll keep spinning for as long as it takes for the world to catch the sparkles and trade their crowns for truth.  It’s only the beginning.

– The Lily

John 10:10

“The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance [to the full, till it overflows].”

beauty, Uncategorized

A Life Exposed

by iamthelilyLeave a Comment on A Life Exposed

The truth about a lie is that if it didn’t bring some sort of illusion of safety/protection or sense of pleasure, then NO ONE would do it.  It seems that within every lie there is another deeper lie that brings a counterfeit appearance of truth and goodness that attaches to our emotions of self-gratification.  But, the truth is that it is completely COUNTERFEIT.  It has the appearance of reality, but it can never even come close to touching the truth.

These counterfeit truths in the end only lead to pain and devastation.  When we align our beliefs with them, we compromise our identity and then are thrown into a vicious cycle of speaking out more lies to protect the first lie thus heaping on the pain and devastation that will ultimately lead to our demise, not to mention the other people who are hurt by the same issues.

I’m not just talking about lies regarding stealing cookies from the cookie jar.  I’m talking about the lies that stand in the way of us realizing our creative potential and destiny.  The fears that peak at us through the mirror and the whispers that entice us to indulge ourselves in the instant gratification of removing ourselves from facing the pain of truth.  Because sometimes, facing the truth means being forced to recognize deeply rooted pain that we do not know what to do with or how to heal.  However, choosing to ignore the issues only keeps us locked in the same pain for eternity.  But, when we take steps towards truth, freedom is always on the other side.  So, why do we choose to align our beliefs with lies?

WE MUST STOP!

Why…because the TRUTH  is GOOD NEWS!  While the lies provide a small sense of gratification for a short time, they pale in comparison to the depth of freedom, passion, and purpose that is found when living in truth.  The lies suggest that to be free from pain you need to hide and lick your wounds. STOP IT!!!  That is not how you were created to live!  We were created to reflect the fullness of JOY and LIFE,  to live a life of passion, adventure, and purpose.  We were made to be fully exposed and proud of it.  We are meant for TRUTH.  It’s time to get naked…to strip off the lies no matter how “real” they appear to be…it’s time to expose the beauty of truth because with it comes freedom.  And more importantly, it’s time to be exposed to the fierce and intense power of TRUTH that will break off all of the lies that have kept us locked up in chains of numbness, fantasies, fear, disappointment, anxiety, and more.  It’s a season of freedom.

Stripping down,

The Lily

John 8:32-36

“And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.  ‘But we are descendants of Abraham,’ they said. ‘We have never been slaves to anyone. What do you mean, You will be set free?’  Jesus replied, ‘I tell you the truth, everyone who sins is a slave of sin.  A slave is not a permanent member of the family, but a son is part of the family forever.  So if the Son sets you free, you are truly free.'”

 

Uncategorized

Love is Not Blind

by iamthelily2 Comments on Love is Not Blind

Love is blind is potentially one of the worst lies that people can believe.  The familiar phrase suggests that when you are loved by someone, you will never actually be seen and accepted for who you are.  There will either always be a foggy haze over the eyes of the person giving you love or that person will maintain total blindness throughout the entirety of your relationship.  The truth is that saying love is blind diminishes the weight and depth of love to something that is more self-serving.  It suggests that in any given relationship, love does not have the potential or capability of continuing if given the opportunity to completely see the truth of who you really are.

I think most Americans would agree that one of the most popular illustrations of love often found at wedding ceremonies can be found in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a:

“Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude.  It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.  Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.  Love never ends.”

And this is where I’m left troubled because if love really is defined by the actions above and the idea that love being blind is really true, then we are all doomed.  We will never then be able to actually receive love because we will never truly be seen.  So, which one is true?

Through my experience, I believe that it is IMPOSSIBLE for real love to be blind.  True love has to be selfless.  When love is selfless, it is not out to receive praise or attention.  Its confidence does not change based on how many likes or comments it receives.  It is not swayed when it is rejected or betrayed because it is ALWAYS rooted and grounded in truth.  It is able to look beyond situations, circumstances, and offense to fully see a person with eyes wide open.  It sees beyond the ugly to the gold buried deep inside, locks its gaze on the gold, and never stops loving until that gold overtakes the person from the inside-out causing them to radiate the beauty of their true identity.  When we say that love is blind, we actually continue to heap dirt over the gold that is buried inside of that person so that in order to find it one will need the deepest oil drill that has yet to be invented.

My identity will not be compromised, nor should yours.  Do not cheapen your value or fall prey to counterfeit definitions of love.  You are meant for more.  Before the creation of the world, you were being called by LOVE, and His name is Jesus.  If you want to know more about love, find a Bible and read the Book of John.  Even if you have never gone to church, opened a Bible, or even know what the heck I’m talking about, if there was any part of this that sparked your interest or brought new revelation to your value and/or love then why not give it a try?  What’s the worst that could happen?

You will always find what your heart is searching for, so keep searching for real love.  I guarantee that you will find it.

With Eyes Wide Open,

– The Lily